Communion 2009

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Just Between You And Me

Originally scheduled for September 13

Just between you and me, God, I hate coming to communion. I have my failures, you know, and I really don’t like to have to talk about them.

Take my anger, for instance. Why do I go into a foul-mouthed rage when some idiot cuts me off on the freeway? I mean, I knew the idiot was out there somewhere. It’s just a matter of time before he finds me. So why do I explode like that?

Another thing – vengeance. I have these daydreams of doing something really horrible to someone just because she flew off the handle at me. It gnaws at me; I’m not a cruel person – am I?

Self-control, that’s a big one with me. My eyes are after every pretty girl, my mouth is after every dessert with chocolate. I’d be in a lot more trouble if I weren’t so lazy about it.

But I’m not lazy when it comes to making a buck – just the opposite. I cut every corner I can for money. But who wouldn’t? I live in a world where there is always more to want – and I always want more. After all, my best buddy has a bigger fishing boat than I do, you know.

You know, you wouldn’t think I could be proud of all that – but I am. It’s not anger, it’s righteous outrage. It’s not cruelty, it’s what they deserve. At least I’m not as bad as some people – somewhere. As long as people don’t attack my pride, it’s harmless, right?

 

Just between you and me, God, I love to come to communion. It’s the only time in the week I can look in an honest mirror. I look down at the bread and cup; I know I’m looking at the body and blood of a better man than I am. How can I stand proud when a better man than I had to take the punishment I deserve? When he did it not because he had to but because he loved me? It’s when I see myself as I really am.

I love to come to communion, Lord. That’s where I can see forgiveness, because forgiveness comes from love, and your love is in my hands. Don’t let me forget, Lord. I’m the sinner, you’re my salvation. Don’t let me forget, Lord. You paid the price, I got a new life. Don’t let me forget, Lord, don’t let me forget.